so i was at yetanotherjx's place last night watching some quality slaughter films when tx called to shoot me an update...

rx has been in an accident.

((gasp))

he was on his bike.

((tears forming))

and he hit a curb.

((try not to laugh))

and he's in the hospital.

((wow))

broken rib, broken face, and probably concussed.

i'd like to imagine it looked sort of like this... but with more blood... and it wasn't at cool beans...



but the word this morning is that he's getting a metal plate in his face. that's hardcore, man.

congratulations, rx, you've out-badassed me.

dear homeboy,
thank you for continuing to be ultra-receptive to my bi-monthly apologies of being a stubborn, overreacting drunken bitch.
love, mengtar.

another night of sorts brought to you by the fantastically stubborn mind of drunklor mengtar. special note: the photos are not from last night and in no way correlate with the story. i will also have you know that it was not my camera and i have no idea to work the settings. get over yourself.

a great night was had at the boiler room in celebration of bballamike's birthday. i helped decorate the cake, and i also accepted free shots.

per usual, after too many drinks ((too few of them being whiskey)) i decided that i was angry ((for probably no reason)). if i am drunk and angry ((again, for probably no reason)), i also usually decide to direct my drunklor anger at homeboy. he's a good sport about it.

i knew that i couldn't drive my prettymobile home, but also refused to get a ride from homeboy. or anyone else, because those people were suggested by homeboy so i was mad ((for probably no reason)) at them by association.







therefore, i'm walking. i live about 4 miles from the square. i'm okay with this.

i start walking home and everyone is calling and texting and apparently made it into a huge ordeal. i pretty much stopped caring.

also, i was cute, but wasn't about to get raped. it looked like i had at least three concealed weapons.

i peed behind a bank. classy.

i angry-walked for a good hour or so with an exceptional level of sass. those hips were dangerous. it was around 3 that i realized that i had no idea where i was.

i got lost.

in denton.

i had been walking and turning, so sure i was homebound, but not stopping to think which way home was. i turned a corner and looked up to see a glowing refuge of familiarity. the wells fargo sign. wait... i'm still on the square!!!

i was defeated and sobering up. i walked back to my car and drove home.

but it doesn't end there. of course not.







homeboy calls to affirm my safety. i'm sober enough to drive, but i'm not sober enough to be rational. that doesn't come until the following afternoon... usually after a stop at jupiter house.

i got home around 4am and decided to discontinue our friendship... again. this usually happens about once a month... and lasts until the following afternoon... usually after a stop at jupiter house.

in true hangoverlor mengtar fashion, i stumbled up to jupiter house this afternoon. i was walking behind four old men and got some catcalls from big momma and little daddy as they drove by. they all turned around to look at me. "it's okay, they're gay." they were not amused.

the radio made me feel angry, so i held imaginary, yet ultra-cool conversations with myself in my car and spilled coffee down my shirt.

i'm the coolest person you know.

one day i will get a camera and show pictures of my amazing car and exceptionally cute hair.

until then...

so last night was pumpkin head's last night in texas. hit up hooligans ((where i still can't drink until i get my ID back... bitches)) and then to andy's to watch bballamike sing. he did a great job until some drunk non-friend decided to try singing with him. i'd have taken a great video of non-friend trying to sing and knowing he wasn't good so he turned the microphone away during all of the high barely in range screamy parts. also, he was bad.

i tried to find my pumpkin afterwards but he had left for ihop. i had every intention of joining him, but ran into the original ax and was swept away by the idea of another round of ((free)) drinks at boiler room.

the original ax said:

so are do you want to come over tonight?

mengtar said:

no, i have to go home.

the original ax said:

come on, you know you want this...

mengtar said:

well... my crotch is still exploding. ((lie))

the original ax said:

i have a shower.

mengtar said:

ew. ((not a lie))

meanwhile, homeboy is standing three feet away. it's always pretty awkward being propositioned for sex when i'm out with him.

i had to give him a ride home because he was too drunklor, where he continued to try touching me and taking out his weewee for me to touch. i managed to decline.

we also ran into my bff, but she un-facebook friended me, so i didn't feel the need to say hi or try to out-fake-nice her.

it's art-fusion night at rubber gloves again. i'm supposed to be joining rx and tx, but just realized this afternoon that i won't be able to get in without my id. fuck this shit.

it's time for rum.

in honor of working double-shifts the past three days, i decided to celebrate by getting schwasted each night and barely sleeping.

it was for the best.

made it out to rubber gloves for the first time ever, and it was pretty alright. perfectly dive and IN denton. ((anyplace that regularly serves dollar peebers ((also referred to as pbr's or pabst blue ribbons, for you southern-folk)) is officially an a-okay dive in the book of mengtar)) met up with rx and tx and their friend from austin. the last wednesday of every month is apparently art night. five people draw on canvases for five minutes then rotate to the right to add to the next persons' drawing. pretty kickass.





also, i think this guy also did the illustrations for the music video of aha's take on me.



also, tx is amazing and i would offer to braid her hair, but it was already done.



i talked to a lot of strangers that bought me a lot of shots and i was a lot of okay with it and will never remember any of them and they will approach me in public in the near future like in the produce aisle of my grocery store where i will be forced to pretend that i enjoyed it.




also, rx'saustinfriendx worked on special effects in the new incredible hulk videogame.

mengtar said:

isn't almost EVERYTHING in videogames special effects? what was your actual contribution?

rx'saustinfriendx said:

i added blood and explosions.

mengtar said:

he demands things to be awesome.



((sorry, ladies, he's taken))



post-rubber gloves awesomeness, tx drove my car back to my house as i was ((un))deniably drunklor for post-bar drinking.





windsor + cream soda = mengtar never leaving the house.




i don't remember much else happening after that other than rx reappearing from the backyard to see his girlfriend and i displaying our titties. un-suprising un-awkward.



((special note: titties were further explosed than photographed))

no. this is NOT batman.



last night was a different night of sorts.

i was again accompanied by rx, tx, and rx'saustinfriendx to throw bones and watch the golden compass.

fuck you, i love nicole kidman.

if the golden compass had been filmed with our drunken commentary, it would have been award-winning. but it did feature a polar bear with a whiskey dependency...

holy shit! my attic creature IS MY GOLDEN COMPASS DEMON!

does chris weitz read my blog? ((don't you dare comment on how he was only the director and didn't write the book or the script just fucking get over yourself))

((groundbreaking))



as much as i still want it, i'm no longer allowed to get this tattoo because apparently every hipster in the world already has it and i don't hang out with hipsters. go back to art6 and work on your cause.



also, i would like to offer a public apology to rx for crossing the line of homester-status. i'm glad you were cool with it, but it's not something you'd have to worry about in the future. the chain is on it.

this is not my butt.



this is my summer:

special note: this post was written sober, added to after drinking, and finished after sobering up... work with me.

in a fit of awesomeness, i went out with best friend and rx with girlfriends in tow for drinks and dominoes. mostly drinks, but after reviewing the photos this morning, apparently there were some dominoes in there too.

we met up at riprocks to see some soul kitchen. i was digging it more than usual and talked to a stranger in a less-awkward-than-usual fashion.







we drank a little more at cool beans... the whiskey starts... and i'd say that my emotional level is at about a 4.




welcome to best friend's bathroom. also, if you take pictures like these and don't delete then, this is what happens. readers, meet rx.





tx is amazing. i can't wait to sit and chat with her and drink wine and sew and cook and make out... i mean... cook. whatever.





i had no problem finishing this baby off. i heart canadian whiskey.




rx likes to pretend that he's emo. i think he pulls it off.





tx has taken a particular liking to my titties and pretends they look like this...




later, my emotional level increased to about a 9 and rx and tx were about as awesome as physically possible and drove me to their futon and back to my car in the morning... well... late afternoon... i'm over it.

as of today's game, carlos gomez ((swoon)) is the third youngest player in mlb history to hit for the cycle.

did anyone else catch the interview/articles of ozzie kissing major ass on the twinkies? just how we're always fun to watch and the way we play the game and whatnot. nothing i didn't already know. but i agree that gomez's career will definitely be epic. i'm already waiting for this years new spread of topps cards so i can frame him up with my other greats. ((bert blylevin, paul molitor, brad radke, kirby puckett, and of course.... wally the beerman))

tonight was something of a different sort. i chilled with brothers and sons at the pourhouse and applebees. loud but chill and too much laughing and drinks... again.

drama ensued when jxnumbereighty-five went through my texting inbox while i was in the ladies room to find texts from homeboy. something about boys i'm not dating becoming ultra-possessive over other boys i'm not dating makes me frustrated5000. maybe i should have had more to drink.