ohemgee is that eminem?



pre-makeout rampage that i have yet to recall.



pictured left: drunklor and sleepy.
pictured right: hungoverlor and almost late to work.



yes, bobby, i'll have a medium triple soy mocha. no thanks on the whip cream. you have a great day too.

there's an old man that i regularly chatitupwith at jupiter house that writes sex novels and makes leather jewelry. he just talked me through my entire speech on universal healthcare.

minnesotaax made me the titlepage to my powerpoint:

maybe this semester will be a success.

oh no! the cute guy that caught me staring at him 6 times in 45 seconds is here! and he's sitting two rows in front of me again!

((don'tlookdon'tlookdon'tlook))

i let the jupiter house barista talk me into veggie cream cheese instead of sundried tomato cream cheese for my onion bagel... it tastes like cole slaw

but he's wearing a floral apron. i can't complain.

if i'm jupiter house AND being productive, i like listening to bolero on repeat...

((heart)) jeff queen

i'm almost done with my homework and i've yet to throw up that last gallon of coffee...



my dear caffeine, don't fail me now!

i hate HATE when i step outside to enjoy a cigarette and there are people standing obnoxiously close having annoying conversation. just make out already so i don't have to hear your mentally-handicapped giggles and snorts.

why can't i just run everyone's life according to my own terms?

((because everyone would be a stuttering, alcoholic, unshowered mess. that's why))

update: the guy that turned around to see me staring at him six times looked back at my computernotebookeverything-sprawl after packing up... i imagined him being disappointed that i wasn't there... but then he watched me outside for thirty seconds while i pretended not to notice...

i just got busted staring at a cute boy at the coffee shop... he turned around about eighty times, and i had to raise my eyes each time he looked forward... he caught me about 6 times in 45 seconds. maybe i should put my hood up and sunglasses on and pretend i have an accent and also i'm a completely different person...

totally believable.

under no circumstances is it acceptable to drunken stumble downstairs for a glass of water wearing only my lambskin rug as a loincloth.



i made it to jupiter house two minutes too late for a soy chai tea latte... but just in time for free drip coffee!



there was a crazy on the street that clapped his hands and pointed at me. he shouted, "i can tell you'll have a fun night by the shape of your hair." i'm glad it's a good hair day. good thing i didn't shower.

countdown to mengtar getting a REAL camera so you don't have to look at her shitty webcam photos... EIGHT DAYS

((it's snowing))

not a happy mengtar.

when working togos at the olive garden, typically 3-4 people have access to the drawer that i take full responsibility for... not the fairest system.

so i got fucked out of some "mishandled" money tonight... about sixty dollars worth... so while i should have walked out with ninety, i have thirty.

do you know how many large hawaiian macadamia nut coffees and bran muffins from jupiter house that is?!?

a lot.

((14.1176))

over a month of caffeine and overly-regular bowel movements. ((but they're soo good!))

it's whatever.

i'm super-questioning faux-giving in chicago this year. i'm not sure if it'd be a better investment to rock it or actually spend christmas with my family. there's no way i can afford both.

when the fuck am i going to pay off my car?

or afford next semester's tuition?

i ran into my favorite crashsite drummer last night. ((swoon)) he apparently just lost his job at kroger for a misweighed salad.

at least i can still steal all the salads i want.

but he will be joining us tuesday for lou's import glass night. excellent.

i'm unable to subdue my drinking habits. even in financially difficult periods, i would let it consume ninety per cent of my budget.

now i even drink alone sometimes.

i haven't decided if i'm a functioning alcoholic, or just an alcoholic.

i came home between classes today in leiu of the bar or jupiter.

i've been drinking waay too much lately and don't remember the last time i drove myself home. i think sober week is quickly approaching, but it will have to wait until after i drink with chutley, who is home from the marine corps until the 13th. stay tuned.

i'm still feeling this morning's coffee.

but it worked for the best, because i get to watch my dog eat bugs off the floor AND i rediscovered my bag of asian medley steamer vegetables and they are AMAZING.

i think this month's diet fad will be coffee, fruits, vegetables, and hotdogs.

i love it when my diets fail, because they usually end at the junction of emotional instability and cx's enchiladas.

her enchiladas are epic.

also, i can't wait for my sociology class so i can get my rock-star paper back from last week AND place my bets with the pretentious jokester that sits in front of me on how many times our teacher will use the word "irregardless" during class.

this week i vote 6.

not-so-cool bearded guy from jupiter house said:

bran muffin again. do you like them?

mengtar said:

no. i just like pooping.

also, homeboy's friend that doesn't like me but complimented my shirt a few days ago waved at me while i approached the coffee shop.

sometimes i just don't know how to be nice.

mengtar does not look like cate blanchett.

and no, you cannot have my phone number.

i think i'm going to move into a bistro...

i wonder how much they would charge for rent if i just sat at a table and drank beer and ate pretty sandwiches and used wifi all day. i'd blog more.

anyway, i finally ate at banter... and it was amazing.




so amazing that we had to make our own faux-bistro meals the next day and mine was just as pretty but his salad was pretty ugly. we can't all be amazing.



also, somebody was totally failing bra patrol...



and fat-face patrol.



ten lbs. of red bell peppers and $105 later, anyone wanting jambalaya tonight will have to venture outside of denton. pwned.



also, i played no part in this... but i gave encouraging laughter and flash photography as i drove by... also, that's totally kahled!!! ((sorry, bro))





mocha shake with peanut butter + lactose intolerance = nap time!



it was haircut night again and i opted for drinking and a diy. but check out that wicked cowlick and amazing chop i made into my hairline.... sad panda...




also, mondays are officially paul slavens night at dan's silver leaf... starting... now.

too much drinking went on in the past week for me to remember most things... but some of the photographs reminded me...



jupiter house is no longer open 24hrs. what. the. fuck. what am i supposed to be antisocial at HOME?!?



my frogs were cute with me one night. they make me so happy. wait... where did snowflake go??



okay, back to cute.



momx visited for five days of drunken amazing times.



we played pool at the boiler room and i apparently introduced momx to everyone and didn't learn about it until last night when everyone asked where she was and said she was awesome. she is awesome.




while we were playing pool i remember some weird lawyer talking to us, and i wasn't sure if he was hitting on me or my mom but then his friend was like "hey, man, have you called your wife back yet?" and we laughed at him.



we shopped and i bought TWO dresses and we tried to find accessories even but we couldn't so i bought a hat instead.




((hey, sx, remember these???))



ALL junk stores should have junk jewelry for junk prices.



i got caught looking at myself when someone pointed out the sign that says "only you can stop narcissism."






this dress is totally julia roberts in pretty woman when the guy that plays george kostanza totally calls her out for being a hooker at the polo game or horse races or whatever. i didn't buy it.




this dress is the happiest dress in the world. but weird because my boobs are too big. my gut fits into it just fine, but i have to push my boobs in to zip the back. i totally bought it.



momx did not buy that dress. ((le sigh of relief))




awww



this building is in austin i think and there is one like it in minneapolis and i think mary tyler moore was filmed there or something i heard once... we call it "ghetto in the sky". if they released a videogame that took place inside ghetto in the sky, i would totally play it.






dci san antonio regional.

go blue team!

i'll rant about that later.



also, we drank and painted.