ohemgee is that eminem?



pre-makeout rampage that i have yet to recall.



pictured left: drunklor and sleepy.
pictured right: hungoverlor and almost late to work.



yes, bobby, i'll have a medium triple soy mocha. no thanks on the whip cream. you have a great day too.

greetings, jerkwads. this is what i've done while you losers beat off to judge judy:

chili flavored ramen > everything.

so... being around homeboy's friends after extensive efforts of making me feel like a drunken ass in front of them the last million times we've been out with them menos xmas eve was... interestingly awkward... but i really mean just straight-up awkward.

jetted to hooli's to get schwasted off melon shots of something. worst. mistake. ever.



i remember being locked out of my house and losing a sock while taking a piss in the front yard. it happens. holding the title of beauty and grace is a rough roll. bust a nigga a break.

also, i lost a sock last night while peeing in my front yard. anyone?

so mengtar is done with everyone.

locked out of house and todos dicen fuck you. but racetracmx attempts at helpin brothas out.

but homies show no love cuz sleepin with bitches.

done and done.

((done))

a summary of antics: drunk and sober.

highlight of xmas was a series of 29 text messages from dadx reading the night before christmas... line. by. line. ((love))

it ended with drunken drama and the end of an era. but with no hard feelings, i have mild confidence that a friendship is plausible... but i do love lying to myself. we will see.



the next day at work, i was so angry and anxious that i told all of my shitty tables that the dog dies at the end of marley and me. i cried a little and edx drew me this...



i like my hair... and the spanish exclamation points...

i was able to successfully cower in school-girl awkwardness when the guy i've had a crush on for two years smiled and waved at me last night. i ran to mAx with a "what do i do?? do i talk to him? what would i say? i'm so nervous. i need to sit down. maybe i should have said hi. or smiled back. or acknowledged that i remember him at all. no, cowering was definitely my best move... stop judging me." it was decided that after my drink i would order a shot, order another drink, order two shots ((one for him)) and that would be my entrance... he left before i finished my drink.

social contact epic failure number 2348974587343483.

i got my first xmas present today! my aunt had actually sent it to my old apartment... i thought it was game over, but the tenants of university courtyards apartment 9304 gave it to the office to sit for a week before being returntosendered. i left them a thankyounote. yesidid.



and sketch gear! i'll post all of my shitty sketches. i think i'll do a series of nekkid girls.

even though i was working up a good eating disorder... I ATE SUSHI... yes, first time. i usually chicken out... the homeses and i rolled to royal east for some bibim bop and our server was also the singer for 800lbs. i think my other friend drums for her... but i couldn't remember.

sweating out all those alcohol and cigarette toxins is more painful and smelly than i had previously imagined. next time i won't wait three days between showers.

done and done.

tuesday's drink to a rage night was decently disappointing. it ended up being more like tuesday's roam around denton with drinks in your hand looking for something to do night.

however, i did meet a schwasted kid that put a weed in my hair...

schwastedkidx said:

wait, wait, wait! stop.

mengtar said:

yes?

schwastedkidx said:

do you like guys or girls?

mengtar said:

uh... guys?

schwastedkidx said:

oh... well, good luck with that.


was he hoping to hook up with a lesbian last night?

i bet if i consumed half as much water as i consume red wine, tonight's run would have been half as painful...

i'm not sure if that sentence is properly structured or if it means i should consume more water or less wine.

i'm over it.

px, you will be HAPPY to know that a ROAD TRIP is being planned to visit SO-CAL so i can see a CERTAIN SOMEONE!!!! i'll keep you updated if you stop being a little cunt about not sending you nudie photos. ((love you))

also... if anyone catches any sweet camera deals/sales/whathaveyous be sure to let me know so i can send some nudie photos to a certain little cunt. ((still love you))

also, let's reminisce.










((i miss pictures))

((FUCK! i need a functioning camera again))

i left my phone at homeboy's yesterday which was particularly devestating, as it was momx's bday and jxsx flew down from eau claire.

no panic, as i was under the assumption that it would have been returned to me prior to 3ish am when i found it on the futon... was angry. no longer. whatever.



had some wine and sandwiches with jxsx and was updated on all the juicy gossip of everyone hating and sleeping with everone.

i forgot to close my bar tab at andy's on drunken tuesday, as i was preoccupied with my escape from stalker boilerjx.

last night i returned to close my tab... and ONLY close my tab...

mengtar said:

hi, i just need to close a tab from the other night.

door guy said:

that's cool. wait... you're the minnesota girl, right?

mengtar said:

yes.

door guy said:

because this band is from minneapolis.

mengtar said:

badass! let's do it!



((couple drinks later... i suck at this sobriety thing))

the band was pictures of then. kind of an indie rock band i guess. ballers regardless.

i approached a band member after their set to show support and such... that was a lie. it was because they were all cute and i wanted to brag about also being from the great white north. don't judge me.

long story short... that was another lie... it's going to be closer to a drunken story recollection rather than a synopsis...



chilled with keyboardist minnesotatx for quite a bit. he drinks miller lite ((ew)) but has exceptionally soft hair.

turns out he has an uncle in fort worth that he was hoping to spend time with, but the band was about to make the trek back home.



umm... let's party?

done.

((i'm so hospi))



also, i think i joined a band.

maybe i'll just spend my holidays in NY alone.



eating pizza.

lots of pizza.

a half hour and a bottle of wine later...

pasta bowl time.

not a happy mengtar.

when working togos at the olive garden, typically 3-4 people have access to the drawer that i take full responsibility for... not the fairest system.

so i got fucked out of some "mishandled" money tonight... about sixty dollars worth... so while i should have walked out with ninety, i have thirty.

do you know how many large hawaiian macadamia nut coffees and bran muffins from jupiter house that is?!?

a lot.

((14.1176))

over a month of caffeine and overly-regular bowel movements. ((but they're soo good!))

it's whatever.

i'm super-questioning faux-giving in chicago this year. i'm not sure if it'd be a better investment to rock it or actually spend christmas with my family. there's no way i can afford both.

when the fuck am i going to pay off my car?

or afford next semester's tuition?

i ran into my favorite crashsite drummer last night. ((swoon)) he apparently just lost his job at kroger for a misweighed salad.

at least i can still steal all the salads i want.

but he will be joining us tuesday for lou's import glass night. excellent.

i'm unable to subdue my drinking habits. even in financially difficult periods, i would let it consume ninety per cent of my budget.

now i even drink alone sometimes.

i haven't decided if i'm a functioning alcoholic, or just an alcoholic.

i came home between classes today in leiu of the bar or jupiter.

i've been drinking waay too much lately and don't remember the last time i drove myself home. i think sober week is quickly approaching, but it will have to wait until after i drink with chutley, who is home from the marine corps until the 13th. stay tuned.

i'm still feeling this morning's coffee.

but it worked for the best, because i get to watch my dog eat bugs off the floor AND i rediscovered my bag of asian medley steamer vegetables and they are AMAZING.

i think this month's diet fad will be coffee, fruits, vegetables, and hotdogs.

i love it when my diets fail, because they usually end at the junction of emotional instability and cx's enchiladas.

her enchiladas are epic.

also, i can't wait for my sociology class so i can get my rock-star paper back from last week AND place my bets with the pretentious jokester that sits in front of me on how many times our teacher will use the word "irregardless" during class.

this week i vote 6.

join me this evening ((before the obnoxious kids come out to play)) on fry street for oktoberfest!

$13ish dollars for free food and a tshirt and a beer stein! $3ish refills all night on oktoberfest brews.

((with bells on))

after class i stopped by target to pick up some necessities.

deoderant.

toilet paper.

shampoo.

part one of three of my halloween costume.

beer.

like making a selection at jupiter house, i stood in the beer aisle for a good ten minutes before deciding on sam adams octoberfest brew.

amazing.

it has a very warm autumn flavor that reminds you of sitting outside on warm autumn nights with oak and pine grazing your senses...

i've never been so sexually aroused by a beverage... ever.

amazing.

i'm too drunk to upload photos.

and still too angry and anxious to discuss this week.



jxnumbereighty-five isn't going to jail ((whew)) but has 20 months of probation, $4k in fines, 80 hours of community service, 2 months of anger management and 2 months of woman battering classes.

at this point, i'm feeling incredibly vengeful.

and then i went to andy's tonight...

heart vengeance.



here lies snowflake. 2006-2008.



worsehalfofjandl... it's not baseball or dead frogs... so check this shit! ((courtesy of rx))




jxnumbereighty-five said:

hey, man, what's with did you do to these brownies?

ix said:

hey, fam... hey...

mengtar said:

seriously. how many eggs did you use?

ix said:

back up.

mengtar said:

bwahaha. is this from a box? how many eggs did you use?

ix said:

i said back up!




also, i totally decided to hook up the photos anyway.



back up.

dan's silver leaf: host of denton's drunkest old man ever!




polls by mengtar, voted best body art.



turns out my boys came through and hooked me up with ticket for 311 and snoop.

fucking. badass.

from the top:

met up with mAx and his girl and their friends.

pregamed.

drove to dallas and stopped at a liquor store with a decently scary bathroom.




note that the toilet paper is several feet from the toilet... less than ideal.



and someone tagged the trashcan... i hope that's not habitual.




stopped at william's chicken ((in the hood)) and was harrassed by a man we weren't sure was a customer or manager. he would switch between greeting customers and yelling at the kitchen. "WUZZA HOULP?!?" ((which we deciphered as "what is the hold up?")) "WUZZA HOULP??!? ay, houya doon? WUZZA HOULP?!? LINE ONE! DINNAS OUT!" he asked another group of all-male concert-goers if they had any white women with them. i felt awkward being the only white girl.



pregamed more in the parking lot.



common sense was walking around the lot looking for a ticket.

a band called full service has been following the tour and playing in the lot. they had a bit of a so-cal feel. v. hip. the drummer had cut an octopus into the front head on his kickbass. its tentacles wiggled when he played.

they're bassist was waay too metal for their rhcp vibe and you could tell he was just wanting to shred and bang and jump. later he did. i was excited. also, he looked like pickles.





i wasn't allowed to bring my camera, but i could have shown you photos of snoops balls we were so close! he was hands down the best rapper i've seen live.

shortly in we passed some js.

snoop's uncle junebug is probably 70 years old and dances like a little rascal.



BUT didn't compare to 311. chad sexton had THREE zildjian spiral trashes! ((RIDICULOUS)) AND a set of marching quads mounted. ((over the top by definition)) and of course we didn't leave without seeing peanut beat that thing.

shortly into 311 randomstrangertomyleftx asked for my lighter and passed to me waay too many times. the perfect enhancement to an incredible show.

both bands have been around forever and played plenty mix of their whole discology. fucking amazing.



i hope i don't have a black eye in the morning... STYLEE!

broadcasting live from my new chair that really ties the room together.

i think i should spend the rest of my night sitting on my chair upside-down and practicing backward somersaulting off of it. you know, for special guest or featured artist entrances.



i'm actually slightly disappointed that i the places i went tonight were places i guess i could have gone earlier. i went to boiler room to catch some hip-hop. i felt bad for talking it up to homeboy, but it sucked when he got there so he left, but then the people that were on stage earlier and were good went back up again and were alright and then sucked again when we left. thursday night! bi-polar hip-hop night! whatever.



in between i went to hailey's for barf-night, err 80's night... whatever. it's ultra-upsetting since the only other times i've been there were for fucking great shows. whatever.





at least haters can't say shit because they were all there and probably danced. gross.

dear homeboy,
thank you for continuing to be ultra-receptive to my bi-monthly apologies of being a stubborn, overreacting drunken bitch.
love, mengtar.

another night of sorts brought to you by the fantastically stubborn mind of drunklor mengtar. special note: the photos are not from last night and in no way correlate with the story. i will also have you know that it was not my camera and i have no idea to work the settings. get over yourself.

a great night was had at the boiler room in celebration of bballamike's birthday. i helped decorate the cake, and i also accepted free shots.

per usual, after too many drinks ((too few of them being whiskey)) i decided that i was angry ((for probably no reason)). if i am drunk and angry ((again, for probably no reason)), i also usually decide to direct my drunklor anger at homeboy. he's a good sport about it.

i knew that i couldn't drive my prettymobile home, but also refused to get a ride from homeboy. or anyone else, because those people were suggested by homeboy so i was mad ((for probably no reason)) at them by association.







therefore, i'm walking. i live about 4 miles from the square. i'm okay with this.

i start walking home and everyone is calling and texting and apparently made it into a huge ordeal. i pretty much stopped caring.

also, i was cute, but wasn't about to get raped. it looked like i had at least three concealed weapons.

i peed behind a bank. classy.

i angry-walked for a good hour or so with an exceptional level of sass. those hips were dangerous. it was around 3 that i realized that i had no idea where i was.

i got lost.

in denton.

i had been walking and turning, so sure i was homebound, but not stopping to think which way home was. i turned a corner and looked up to see a glowing refuge of familiarity. the wells fargo sign. wait... i'm still on the square!!!

i was defeated and sobering up. i walked back to my car and drove home.

but it doesn't end there. of course not.







homeboy calls to affirm my safety. i'm sober enough to drive, but i'm not sober enough to be rational. that doesn't come until the following afternoon... usually after a stop at jupiter house.

i got home around 4am and decided to discontinue our friendship... again. this usually happens about once a month... and lasts until the following afternoon... usually after a stop at jupiter house.

in true hangoverlor mengtar fashion, i stumbled up to jupiter house this afternoon. i was walking behind four old men and got some catcalls from big momma and little daddy as they drove by. they all turned around to look at me. "it's okay, they're gay." they were not amused.

the radio made me feel angry, so i held imaginary, yet ultra-cool conversations with myself in my car and spilled coffee down my shirt.

i'm the coolest person you know.