new game plan... again...

instead of eating... ever... i'll just put all of those funds and effort towards not eating and photo shoots with merkley??? when i go out to cali.

and then give them to px.

but i can still spend money on coffee from jupiter house, wine, liquor, and cigarettes... and the import beer of the night on tuesdays at lou's... and maybe the occasional bran muffin...

but that's it!

and i mean business!

((balls))

oh yeah, and i totally went on a 12 lb. chicken scampi and cheesecake and beer binge there for a while, but that's over. welcome back to 158. and i'm going to keep on the running thing in minnesota, but if i come back any more than 160, i'm going to lie down on some railroad tracks.

you're laughing, i'm not laughing.

4 days til 311 and snoop!!!

i dreamt that i bic'd my head. it was pretty hot. and it made me a half pound lighter. high five.

but in real life, i lost all of the party-weight from the momx visit. in another 8.4 pounds, i'm going to eat ice cream for a week straight. having a lactose intolerance, that might even work in my favor.



with those pythons, cx can single-handedly save the tatas.

also, i still need a mildly-classy event to wear my oh-so-cute yellow dress.

i think i have worms because my poop has been different lately.

but i'm not getting skinny so i guess that doesn't really count.

last night i wanted to go dive bar hopping in lake dallas. they have two or three bars but one was closed and i couldn't find the other one so homeboy and i just went to barflies. it was about as exciting as a dive bar can be.

there were a dozen overweight girls and one almost pretty one if she didn't have such shitty hair and clothes and their cowboy boyfriends that are probably actually schoolbus drivers or subway sandwich artists taking up the whole length of the bar when i arrived and they gave me that "you're not from here" stinkeye when i arrived.

i was okay with that because i was planning on speaking to the bartender only.

i was trying to out-mysterious this guy the whole time i was there by myself before homeboy showed up. he turned around to look at me once, so i think i won.



mengtar said:

i want to go to a rodeo.

homeboy said:

like shoedogging? or bullriding?

mengtar said:

i don't think i can talk to you for a minute.



the drinks were crazy strong and i was slightly drunklor after a couple double seven-sevens. we left for homeboys and i ((in all my grace and glory and predictability)) got pulled over... again... for having a headlight and a taillight out... again...

mengtar is BROKELOR!!!!!

i called ralph at royal tire: minnesota's largest commercial tire dealer today. he was little help in assuring me that my warranty was up by about 25k miles, but had the BEST minnesota accent. i can't believe i actually sound like that.

after i decided that having to buy new tires was a definite possibility, i pouted in my living room and rolled all around the house on my tire. it was pretty fun. i should get an extra one.



jeff at discount tire was MUCH more helpful.

jeff said:

hi, how are you doing? what can we do for you?

mengtar said:

((oh shit, a stranger is talking to me and i almost just fell on my ass because flip-flops have zero traction on this floor if it is even mildly damp or even humid and it has been raining all morning, QUICK, think of something to say)) i have a nail in my tire!

jeff said:

heh, alright. which tire is it?

mengtar said:

the one in the trunk. ((as if i would still be driving on it? i don't know))



i wasn't sure if i should just have the tire fixed or if i should just replace that tire or if i should i replace all of the tires. jeff and i took a look at the car and concluded that i should replace all of my tires since none of them even had enough tread to pass texas vehicle inspections. fucking state trying to take responsibility for our environment and vehicle safety. whatever.

he explained a couple of their products to me and i asked about one of their mid-priced tires...



jeff said:

that tire is actually out of stock.

mengtar said:

well how long would it take to order it?

jeff said:

((le sigh)) about three business days...

mengtar said:

well that's a good deal. let's do that.

jeff said:

((sigh del grande)) i tell you what... i'll give you these $90 tires for the price of the out of stock $65 tires and you can keep the 60k miles warranty.

mengtar said:

SOLD!

to get a good deal on tires, apparently you just need to request their out of stock items and be from the same state as your tire dealer.

also, jeff was from duluth.

this is my ass at 160. i had a whole spinach pizza and chocolate and peanut butter and caramel bar thing in celebration.



dear harrison ford,
you're not bruce willis.
love, mengtar



also, i went to five auto-parts stores to find 2 things to fix my headlight and taillight. i hate auto-parts store workers except the old guy at the mazda dealership because he told a bunch of people on the phone that i was pretty. i'm okay with that.

i'm not sure if i miss being a player or am just sick of being played.

mengtar = ridiculous vulnerable.

joe said:

do you have any money to start up a bar? oh do we get to rob banks

mengtar said:

that's your job

joe said:

so what is your job?

mengtar said:

my job is to open it

joe said:

what would you say, ya do here, exactly

mengtar said:

haha. you know, cut the ribbon and drink. OPEN the bar. i get teh keys.

joe said:

you would be the first person I throw out of my bar

mengtar said:

there will be rules. no popped collars. no throwing out the person who opens the bar. no diving...

joe said:

wait just one fucking second! no one tells me when I can and cannot pop my collar I'm so getting the shaft in this deal. I have to move. I have to front the money, run the whole place.... while you smoke and drink yourself to death after cutting a ribbon, a ribbon that I will probably have to hang. you're a terrible buisness partner

mengtar said:

i am a good worker. and i know a good deal of things

joe said:

like?

mengtar said:

hmm... do i go spend money and get a meatball sub or save my money for a mattress and get skinny?

joe said:

hmmmmm. fat and happy or skinny and well rested

i think mike hid the scale. i don't know how much i weigh. which might be a good thing right now.

obsess much?

also, i gained 7 lbs. gross.

yay!!! okay, i don't really talk about this very much but i would go ahead and mark today as a landmark day.

lost 25 lbs. as of this morning.



i'm happy, i'm proud, but god damn i miss ice cream and cookies and chips and burgers and loading everything with cheese.



also, check out my awesome new panties, and ignore my bedhead and the mess on the floor.

i restarted running every day. i'm trying to be hardcore about it so i can really knock out this half marathon that is approaching a lot faster than i had hoped it would.

i quit smoking kind of too. i mean, when i drink, i'll probably have a few, but i'm also cutting back on my drinking. mostly i quit buying cigarettes because i have to pay all those fucking bills and shit. fuck.

jx and i took defensive driving last night. it was alright. it was supposed to be six hours of hell so i could get a lower car insurance rate and jx could erase a speeding ticket from his record. however, now they have a thing called the "comedy defensive driving" where a local standup comedian teaches the class. it was alright, and we ended up getting out of class after only 4.5 hours. the guy wasn't hilarious, but how many defensive driving jokes can you make in 4.5 hours? also, it was at joe's crab shack. so we ate decent food. however, we couldn't drink. i don't understand why we couldn't drink in a defensive driving course.

i smoked out with a couple of jx's friends from metro the other night. they were a lot cooler than i remembered meeting them. i was alright with that. then jx and i realized that this was the first time we had actually smoked pot together. what the fuck. we had both smoked it many-a-time since i had moved to texas, and many-a-time before i moved to texas, but never together. it was a cute moment.

also, our defensive driving instructor was super into Mitch Hedberg. I was down with that.

so I'm back in texas. it's nice. i missed it. what the fuck. i missed texas. like, every part of it. whatever.

i went to roster's in st. cloud. the guy that owns it used to be one of the managers at the copper lantern where i used to work, as well as both of my sisters. i was not impressed. the landscaping was bad. the architecture was bad. the chairs were apholstered in red velvet... it's a sports bar, not a casino. and today was the day of like everyone's mlb season openers and the biggest tv had the discovery channel. what the fuck. the soup was great, the stir fry was okay.

so now it's been officially decided ((by myself)) that i'm super dieting now. like... well... starting tomorrow i guess. and i'm going to be running a lot.

tomorrow is also car insurance and apartment day! huzzah!

snowflake grew. he eats cars now.